What's In A Name?

When I first heard the name 'Team Super Aguri' I thought it must be an insanely violent Japanese cyberpunk cartoon on Sky. Surprisingly it turns out to be something even better...

In my head they had outlandish haircuts and went around doing superhuman things, and the truth isn't far off: despite their first pit stops being choreographed by the Chuckle Brothers, what the team have actually achieved in so little time is a pretty superhuman feat.

We've all grown used to a relatively stable line-up of teams of late, and it's great to see new ones like Aguri diving in. In the eighties and early nineties it seemed like dozens of crazy new names would appear and disappear each season.

It would be nice if more teams had such lively sounding names though: Super Aguri is just the kind of name we need, and in fact Yuji Ide does sometimes sport a strangely Manga haircut too - so that's perfect.

Red Bull always sounded just right for a cool fast team; and their second team Toro Rosso is a brave and cheeky attempt to extend that vibe, but makes the staggering faux-pas of nicking the word 'Scuderia'.

And although I'm not actually a Ferrari devotee, even I hold the somewhat irrational belief that nobody else has the right to call themselves 'Scuderia' anything...

'Midland' however, must be the most non-F1 name ever dreamt up - even when they put 'F1' right next to it. It could only lack more glamour if they called the team 'Kidderminster' or 'Derek'. Even calling it Scuderia Midland wouldn't save that one...

It seems a bit unfair to blame Midland for being dull though: that's like blaming the rain for being wet... go to www.midland.gg and you'll be surprised they didn't paint the car completely grey. And make the drivers wear grey nylon slacks.

Super Aguri could certainly teach the big teams a few things about exciting names: Renault becomes 'Equipe Ultra Flav', McLaren becomes 'Silver Shiny Ronster Monsters'... it would be the perfect marriage to James Allen's hyperactive commentaries.

It still leaves us with the problem of what to call Midland though. I'm still working on something sexy and exciting that starts with the word 'Conglomerate'...